Smoking Jokes Messages New Best 2017

Smokers have smoking heart,
Drinkers have an@ alcoholic heart.
I request you Plz don't eat sugar
coz u already have a Sweet Heart

Six Components of Wellness

There are six components of wellness:
proper wei@ght and diet,
proper exercise,
breaking the smoking habit,
control of alcohol,
stress management and periodic exams

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Smoking Injurious to Health

Nice lines by@ a "Broken Heart",
"Few years back smoking was injurious to health.
But in recent years trusting is injurious to life"

Trying to give up Smoking

It took a lot of willpower, but
finally I have given up
.........trying 2 give up smoking

Smoking is a Few Minute Kick

Smoking= few minute kick,
Drin@king= few hours kick,
Love= few month kick
but friendship is lifelong kick...
but it is spirit of life
good night.

Be a Real Man

Anybody Can Quit Smoking
But@
It Takes A Real Man To Fight
Lung Cancer

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What's more hard to quit??

Smoking is hard to quit
"People think smoking is hard to quit !!
Oh God, clearly
.
.
.
they haven't tried to quit Facebook yet!"

Convicted for Smoking

A monkey was once tried and convicted
for smoking a cigarette in
South Bend, Indiana

After a person quits Smoking

Three years aft@er a person quits smoking,
there chance of having a heart attack
is the same as someone
who has never smoked before

Costs attributed to Smoking

At least 7% of all health care
costs in th@e United States
are attributed to smoking


The British Medical Journal has estimated that
smoking one cigarette takes 11 minutes
off the av@erage person's life.

To replace the activity of Smoking

When t@he Pez mint dispenser
was first introduced
it was meant to
replace the activity of smoking

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Smokers on a smoking roll

I do think New Year's resolutions
can't technically be expected to
begin on New Year's Day, don't you?
Since, bec@ause it's an extension of New Year's Eve,
smokers are already on a smoking roll
and cannot be expected to stop abruptly
on the strok@e of midnight with
so much nicotine in the system.
Also dieting on New Year's Day
Isn’t a good idea as you can't eat
rationally but really need to be free
to consume whatever is necessary,
moment by moment, in order to ease your hangover.
I think it wou@ld be much more sensible
if resolutions began generally on
January the second

Smoking Kills

Smoking kills. If you're killed,
you've lost a very
important part of your life.

The Pause of Mr Claus

Santa Claus wears a Red Suit,
He must be a communist.
And a beard and long hair,
Must be a paci@fist.
What's in that pipe that he's smoking?
The Pause of Mr. Claus

Papa Ke Samne Smoking

Santa was sm@oking in front of his father.
His friend- Oye papa ke samne smoking kar raha he?
Santa- Baapu he, koi petrol pump thodi na he.

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If we got married

Girl: If v gt married stop smoking.
Boy:Ok!
Girl:Drinkng 2.
Boy:Ok!
Girl:N goin to d nite club 2.
Boy:-Yes..
Girl:-Wht e@lse cn u leav??
Boy:-D idea of marryng u!!

Pumpkin trying to quit Smoking

Q. What do you give to a pumpkin
who is trying to quit smoking?
A. A pumpkin patch!!!

Smoke loses itself in the Sky

Men love b@ecause they are afraid of themselves,
afraid of the loneliness that lives in them,
and need someone in whom they can
lose themselves,
as smoke loses itself in the sky.

Warning to those who don‘t Smoke

Dis is a warning to all those people
who don@‘t smoke or drink. one day,
you‘ll lose all ur friends,
they will all die & you‘ll be left
alone. so, start smoking.


Trust Cigratte More Than A Girl.
Cigratte ma@y Damage your Lungs
But Will Never Break your Heart

Koi Aae To Bata Dena

Bewekufi ki hadh:
.
.
.
.
.
cigrt pite hue hmne
dost ko b@ola koi ae to bta dena,
usne ati hui meri ammi ko bta dia !

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Smoking Poem on Cigarette

Phir ek cigarette jala raha hoon
Phir ek teeli bujha raha hoon
Teri nazar me ye mashgla hy
Mian to tera wada bhula raha hoon.
Samjhna mat isko meri aadat
Ye dhuwaan jo main urra raha hoon
Ye teri yado@on k silsilay hain
main teri yaaden jala raha hoon.
Phir ek cigarette …
Phir ek teeli …
Main pee k etna behak chuka hoon
K gham k qissay suna raha hoon
Agar tumhai@n bhe gham hay to paas aao
Main pee raha hoon pilla raha hoon…
Phir ek cigarette …
Phir ek teeli …

A Boy smoking cigarette at an Airport

Ek bar ek ladka airport
ke paas cigreatte pi raha tha.
ek ladki us ke@ paas gayi aur pucha
ki tum din bhar mein kitni cigrette pi jaate ho.
ladka- yeh hi koi 50-60.
ladki- agar cigrette ke paise
saving kiye hote toh
saamne wali BMW car tumhari hoti.
ladka- tum cigrette piti ho,
nahi toh kya yeh BMW tumhari hai, nahi.
ladka- chal nikal yahan se
woh BMW car bhi meri hi hai.

Smoking is a slow Poison

Vani: Tuje pata hai
smoking slow@ poison
ka kaam karte hai.
Funy: To mujhay konsa
marnay ki jaldi hai

Sab Se Mushkil Kaam

Father:
Tumne University K 4 Saal Me
Sab Se Mushkil Kaam Kon Sa Seekha?
Son: W.11 K@i Chatt Pe Taiz Hawaon Me
1 Teeli Se 3 CIGERATE Jalana…!!!

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Cigrate Se Hone Wali Becheni

Girl to Doctor: Main jab cigrate peeti hun
to ajeeb si becheni feel hoti hai
main pehla kash lete hi apne
shoes utar deti hun doosre kash main socks,
3rd kush main shirt or 4th main...
DOCTOR: bus ye lo gold flake
or sari baten tafseel se btao.

Cigrette Ki Dukaan

Rok Do Mere JanaZe Ko ZaLimo,
Mjh Mein JaaN aa Gai Hai,
PeeChe Mur K De@kho KaMeeNo,
CiGrette Ki DuKaan aa Gai Hai…

Gaps Between Fingers

Do u know y God created gaps between fingers??
Nooooooo!!
BCZ
Sumone will come in ur life,,,hold ur hand & slowly say
“Le Cigr@atte te sutta laga”

Philosophy from a Passionate Smoker

The great PHILOSOPHY from a passionate smoker:
“I always think of l@eaving cigaratte”
But for thinking I need a cigaratte.


People say that smoking is not good
but it is the way to keep loving cos
S=send
M=me
O=one
K=kiss
E=everyday

Kaber Par Cigratte Jala Raha Hai Koi

Maut k baad yaad aa raha hai koi..
cigrate meri kaber@ par jala rahahai koi..
yaa rab..! 2 pal ki mohalat aur de de mujay.
Akelay Akelay suttay laga raha hai koi.

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Cigratte Ek Lanat Hai

Cigrate ek lanat hai
Jo hamare nojawano ko tabah kar rahi hai.
Aao mil k is lanat ko khatam karien.
1 packe@t tum khatam karo
1 packet hum khatam kartay hain.

Smoker Never Dies

Every cigarette you smoke,
decreases your life by 5 minutes.
Sex increases your life by10 minutes.
So basic theme of equation is that
“A FUCKING SMOKER NEVER DIES.”;-)

Cigarette Ne Bhi Kya Kudrat Dikhayi

Ek tanha raat me aap ki yaad aayi,
Yaad ko mita@ne k liye hum ne cigerate jalayi.
Cigirate ne bhi kya kudrat dikhayi,
Dhuwe ne aap ki tasweer banayi.

Cigarette Jaisa Sulook Usny Mujh Se Kiya

Sulook usny mujh se kisi cigarette jaisa kiya,
Pehly jalaya phir piya paon rakha bujha diya,
Yani talab thi usko meri kuch waqt k liye,
pehly lagaya ho@nt se or phir dhuwen me uradiya,
Apni sansain khench k meri khushbu khud men basa li,
Meri jalti hui rakh ko apni ungliyun se giradiya.

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Meaning Of Pyaar by Smokers?

It’s A Group Of Friends
Sitting Around A Table And “Smoking”
& Saying….
“P – Yaar”…

Baap Aur Beta Ek Hotel Me

Ek Hotel me
Papa:
Waiter,
.
1 Cigarette Aur 1@ Ice-Cream Lao…
.
.
.
Beta:
Ice-Cream Kyu Papa?
.
Aap Bhi Cigare@tte Pijiye Na..!!

Proud to be a Smoker

Once I Read
Love Is A@n Illusion
I QUIT loving
I Used To Drink WINE
I Read
WINE Is Bad For Health
I Left Drinking
Once I Read
Smoking I@s Injurious To Health
You Know What I Did?
I Left “Reading”!

टिप्पणियाँ