santa banta sms message in hindi2017


  1. Bahut Pareshan Halat me Santa Apne Dost Banta ke Ghar Gaya.
  2. Banta: kya hua itna Pareshan kyo hai?
  3. Santa: kya Batau Yaar, Meri Patni Kitna Juth bolti hai.
  4. B: Tujhe Kaise pata?
  5. S: Parso meine use phone karke puchha kaha hai, to kaheti hai Me apni Behen ke sath hu.
  6. B: to hogi naa.
  7. S: Kaise hogi Yaar, uski Behen ke sath to Mein tha.

  9. ..................................................................
  10. Santa: ‘Ek Kunwari Ladki Niche Khadi Hai’ Ko English me Kis Tarah kahoge?
  11. Banta: Boss, Malum Nahi..
  12. Santa: Are Bewakoof Itna bhi Nahi Jantey ‘Miss Under Standing’ (Misunderstanding)

  14. ..................................................................
  15. Santa: Hathi aur Ganne me kaise Fark kiya ja sakta hai?
  16. Banta: utha ke dekhiye, uth jaye to Ganna nahi to Hathi!

  18. ..................................................................
  19. Banta: Tum Khane se Pehle Kele ko Chhilte nahi ho??
  20. Santa: kya Jarurat hai! Mujhe Pata he bhitar kya hai.

  22. ..................................................................
  23. Santa: tumhara Bavarchi Rasoi me Khana Pakate waqt Muh se Sitee kyu bajata raheta hai?
  24. Banta: esa maine hi use kaha hai, kyuki isse mujhe pata chalta he ki wo Kitchen me kuch Kha nahi raha he.


  27. ..................................................................
  28. Banta: Tu kaha paida hua tha??
  29. Santa: hospital me.
  30. Banta: kyo? Kya Bimaari thi Tujhe??

  32. ..................................................................
  33. Santa Bhikhari se:
  34. Bhikhari: Ek Rupeeya dena Baba, wo Dus Lakh dega.
  35. Santa: Tu ek Rupeeya Mujhe dekar Dus Lakh Khud Collect kyo nahi karta!
  36. ..................................................................
  37. Santa Ne Nokia Ka Sabse Badi Screen Wala Phone Liya,
  38. .
  39. Kyu?
  40. .
  41. .
  42. .
  43. Qki Wo Dekhna Chahta Tha K Phone ‘ON’ Hone Par Kaun 2 Log Hath Milate Hai..

  45. ..................................................................
  46. Santa Ek Din Electric Ki Dukaan Mein:
  47. Do Fan Dena Ek Female Aur Ek Male.
  48. Dukaandar: Fans Mein Female Aur Male Nahi Hota Hai!
  49. Santa: Kyon Nahi Hota Ji
  50. Ek Bajaj Ka De Aur Ek Usha Ka..

  52. ..................................................................
  53. Sardar Ko Sapne Aaya, Sapney Me Ek Ladki Ne Usko Chappal Mari,
  54. 3 Dino Tak Sardar Apne Bank Nahi Gaya,
  55. Qki Bank Me Likha Tha..

  57. ‘Hum Aapke Sapney Ko Haqiqat Me Badalte Hai..’



  61.  
  62. ..................................................................
  63. Firangi, 

  65. "India Mein Sabse Zayda Baraf Kahan Padti Hai?"

  67. .

  69. .

  71. .

  73. Smarts Answer By Our Santa

  75. .

  77. .

  79. .

  81. Santa: 


  84. "8 P.M. Se Pehle Kashmir,8 P.M. Ke Baad Whiskey Ke Glass Mein!

  86. ..................................................................
  87. Ek Interview Mein,

  89. Interviewer: Scooter Kaise Chalta Hai?
  90. Santa: Dhhur ­Rr………….

  92. Interviewer Shouts: Stop It!!

  94. Santa: Dhrr Dhupp Dhupp Dhupp Dhupp

  96. ..................................................................
  97. Santa: Agar Nariyaal Ke Ped Pe Chad Jau To..
  98. Engineering College Ki Ladkiya Dikh Jayegi.
  99. Banta: Fir Hath Chhod Dena,

  101. To Medical College Ki Bhi Dikh Jayegi.

  103. ..................................................................
  104. Accident K Baad:

  106. Driver- Maine Car Ki Headlight Chalu Kar K Bataya Tha Ki

  108. Pahle Mujhe Nikalne Do

  110. .

  112. .

  114. .

  116. .

  118. .

  120. .

  122. Santa- Mene Bhi To Wiper Chala Kar Bataya Tha Ki

  124. 'Na Kake Na'

  126. ..................................................................
  127. Banta: Aj Party Kis Khushi Me?
  128. Santa: Meri Scooter Gum Ho Gayi
  129. Banta: To..!!



  133. Santa: Shukar Mano Me Us Par Nai Baitha Tha Warna Me B Kho Jata.



  137.  ..................................................................
  138. Teacher: Batao Pankha Male Hai Ya Female?





  144.  
  145. Santa: Agar ‘Khaitan’ Ka Ho To Male Aur ‘Usha’ Ka Ho To Female Hoga.
  146. ..................................................................
  147. Santa, Banta Se:
  148. Agar Tujhe Tabele Me Bheinse Gin Ni Ho To Kaise Ginoge?

  150. Banta: Asaan Hai,


  153. Bheins Ke Singhh Ginke Use 2 Se Divide Kar Dunga.

  155. ..................................................................
  156. Ek Din Santa Ne 1 Ladki Ko Himmat Juta Kar Bol Dala – I Love You.
  157. Ladki(Gusse Se) : Thoda Pyaar Se Nahi Bol Sakte?

  159. Santa : I Love You Didi..!!

  161. ..................................................................
  162. Santa: Aaj Mene Bus Ke Piche Daudkar 15 Rupey Bacha Liye.

  164. Banta : Kya Yaar, Tum To Bahut Murkh Ho, Agar Taxi Ke Piche Bhagte To 150 Rupey Bachte Na!
  165. ..................................................................
  166. Ek Chor Santa Ka Mobile Ko Lekar Bhag Raha Tha.
  167. Santa Hasne Laga..
  168. Banta: Wo Tumhare Mobile Ko Lekar Bhag Raha Hai Aur Tum Hans Rahe Ho??

  170. Santa: Bhagne Do, Charger To Mere Paas Hai!



  174.  
  175. ..................................................................
  176. Santa: Yaar Itni Daru Na Piya Karo, Tumhari Saanso Se Bhi Badbu Aati Hai.
  177. Yehi Haal Raha To Tumhe Nark Me Bhi Jagah Nahi Milegi.

  179. Banta: Koi Gal Nai Yaar, Saanse To Me Yehi Chhod Kar Jaunga..!!

  181. ..................................................................
  182. Santa Ki Loutri Lagi Aur Woh Ghar Par Jakar Apni Wife Se Bola...
  183. Santa - Agar Meri Loutri Lagi To Tum Kya Karogi?
  184. Wife – Me 50% Lekar Tumhe Chhod Dhungi.

  186. Santa - Ye Le 50 Rupye Aur Nikal Yaha Se.

  188. ..................................................................
  189. Santa: Oye Banta Yaar! Soch Agar Electricity Nahi Hoti To Kya Hota..??

  191. Banta: Kuch Nahi Yaar, Humein Candle Light Me T.V Dekhna Padta..

  193. ..................................................................
  194. Teacher: Jis Aadmi Ke Dono Haath Na Ho,
  195. Use Hindi Aur English Me Kya Kahenge?
  196. Santa: Hindi Me THAKUR Aur

  198. English 
  199. ..................................................................
  200. Santa: Mujhe Mere Mobile Me MP3 Songs Dalwane Hai.
  201. Mobile Wala: Apke Pas Memory Card Hai Kya?

  203. Santa: Nahi Memory Card Nahi Hai, RASAN CARD Chalega?



  207.  ..................................................................
  208. Santa Ko Rota Dekh Kar Banta Ne Pucha Kya Hua?
  209. Santa: Maine 2 Ton Ka AC Kharida,

  211. Ghar Aakar Tolkar Dekha To Sirf 35 Kilo Ka Nikla!

  213. ..................................................................
  214. Santa Ko Uska Sasur Jute Se Maar Raha Tha,
  215. Admi: Kyu Maar Rahe Ho?
  216. Sasur: Meine Ise Hospital Se SMS Kiya.

  218. Tum Baap Ban Gaye Ho. Isne Wahi Sms Apne Sare Friends Ko Forward Kar Diya!

  220. ..................................................................
  221. Teacher Santa Se: Tumne Home Work Q Nahi Kiya?
  222. .
  223. .
  224. .
  225. .
  226. .
  227. .
  228. .

  230. Santa: Sir, Kyuki Hum To ''Hostel'' Me Rahte Hai..!!

  232. ..................................................................
  233. Santa: Mere Dada Ne 1947 Ki Jung Mein Dushmano Ki Tangain Kaat Di Thi.
  234. Banta: Gardaniey Q Nahi Kati?

  236. Santa: Qki Wo Pehle Se Hi Kati Hui Thi.

  238. ..................................................................
  239. Santa Police ke interview Par:
  240. Interviewer - Bheed ko Hatane Ke Liye Kya Karna Chahiye?

  242. Santa - Chanda Mangna Chalu Kar Dena Chahiye.
  243. ..................................................................
  244. Santa Apni Biwi Ke Office Gaya To Usne Dekha Ki Uski Biwi
  245. Boss Ki Godi Me Baithi Dictation Le Rahi Thi.
  246. Santa: Chal Rajjo, Aisi Noukari Nahi Karni,

  248. Jaha Staff K Liye Khursi Bhi Na Ho.
  249. ..................................................................
  250. Santa Battery Ki Dukan Me Gaya Aur Battery Badal Ne Ke Liye Kaha.
  251. Dukandar Ne Puchha: Exide Laga Du?

  253. Santa: To Dusri Side Kya Tera Baap Lagayega?

  255. ..................................................................
  256. Santa : Yaar Banta Me To Duvidha Me Fass Gaya Hu..
  257. Banta: Kyu? Kaise?


  260. Santa: Yaar Biwi Ke Makeup Ka Kharcha Bardast Nahi Hota, Aur Makeup Ke Binaa Biwi Bardast Nahi Hoti!

  262. ..................................................................
  263. Professor Banta Ne Plumber Ko Apne College Bulaya,
  264. Pata Hai Kyu??
  265. .
  266. .

  268. Kyuki Wo Check Karna Chahta Tha Ki Question Paper Kaha Se Leak Ho Raha Hai..!!!

  270. ..................................................................
  271. Santa Sharab Pii Ke Tala Kholne Laga, Hath Kapne Ki Vajah Se Tala Khula Nahi,
  272. Banta - Main Khol Du Tala?

  274. Santa - Main Khol Lunga, Tu Bas Ghar Ko Pakad, Sala Bahut Hil Raha Hai.
  275. ..................................................................
  276. Banta: Oye Santa, Tu To Doctor Ke Pass Jaane Waala Tha, Kyu Nahi Gaya?

  278. Santa: Yaar Banta Kal Jaaonga, Aaj Thodi Si Tabiyat Kharab Hai.

  280. ..................................................................
  281. Santa  TV Ki Dukan Me Gaya Or Use Puchha,
  282. 'Aap Color TV Bechte Hai?

  284. Dukanwala Bola: Haaji.

  286. Santa Bola: To Mujhe Ek Hara Vala Dena!

  288. ..................................................................
  289. Santa Baraf Ka Tukda Utha Kar Use Gour Se Dekh Raha Tha.
  290. Banta - Kya Dekh Raha He??

  292. Santa - Dekh Raha Hu Ki Ye Barf Leak Kaha Se Ho Raha He..!!

  294. ..................................................................
  295. Santa Ne Jalte Hui Building Se 8 Logo Ko Uski Jaan Pe Khel kar Bahar Nikala
  296. Fir Bhi Usko Jail Ho Gayi
  297. .
  298. Kyu..?
  299. .
  300. .

  302. Kyu Ki Wo Sab Firebrigade Wale The..


कोई टिप्पणी नहीं:

एक टिप्पणी भेजें

सदस्यता लें संदेश (Atom)