Perfect Marriage Material
Pappu is 33 years old and still single. One day, a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"
Pappu replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."
His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution. Just find a girl who's just like your mother."
A few months later, they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"
With a frown on his face, Pappu answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."
The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"
Pappu replied, "Now my father doesn't like her."
PAPPU
Pappu Jokes
Pappu Bazaar Gaya. Wahan Use Papa Ke Ek Purane Dost Mil Gaye.
Uncle: Pappu Beta, Kaise Ho ?
Pappu: Ji, Badhiya ..........
Uncle: Aur Papa ?
Pappu: Ji Vo Bhi Badhiya.....
Uncle: Bhai ?
Pappu: Vo Bhi Theek Hai.....
Uncle: Studies?
Pappu: Vo Bhi Theek Chal Rahi Hai.
Uncle: Aur Sunaao Pappu Beta, Kya Chal Raha Hai ?
Pappu: Bematalab Ke Sawaal Jawaab.....!
Teacher: A B C D Sunao..
Pappu: A B C D...
Teacher: Aur Sunao??
Pappu: Sab Theek Hai Mam ji, Aap Sunao... Kya Chal Raha Hai Aajkal...?
English Teacher: Wo Larki Sab Larkon Se Hans Kar Bat Krti Hai. Batao Is Sentence Mein Larki Kya Hai ? Pappu: Sir! Larki Chaalu Hai...!!!
Teacher: Pappu, Iski English MEin Translate Karo: Larkiyan Yahan Se Guzar Chuki Hain.
Pappu: Oh Shit! I Am Late...
PAPPU
My Computer!!!
Pappu rings a call centre and complaining about his Internet.
Pappu: My internet is not working properly.
Officer: Ok, Double click on "My computer"
Pappu: I can't see your computer.
Officer: No no, click on "My computer" on your computer.
Pappu: How can I click on your computer from my computer?
Officer: Listen, There is an icon labelled "My Computer" on your computer. Ok double click on it.
Pappu: What the hell, what is your computer doing on my computer..?
Officer: Double click on your computer.
Pappu: On which Icon I've to click.
Officer: My Computer.
Pappu: Oh you fool......
Tell me where is your office. I'll come there and click on your "Computer."?
PAPPU
A Dinner Date
Pappu met up with his close friend Bunty and told him that he had just met the girl of his dreams. He asked Bunty for advise on how he should proceed!
The wise and experienced man of the world, Bunty said, "Well, send her roses, and on the name card invite her for a home-cooked meal."
Pappu liked the idea, so he followed Bunty's advice and invited the woman. Next day after the dinner Bunty called Pappu and asked him how did the home-cooked dinner go.
Pappu cried, "It was a complete flop."
Bunty asked, "Why? Didn't the girl come to your house?"
Pappu replied, "She came, but she refused to cook and left angrily!"
Legal and Logical
Pappu failed in the final Law Exam & decided to make a deal with the Professor.
Pappu: Sir, Can I ask you one question?
Professor: Yes.
Pappu: If you can answer this question, I will accept my final marks, if you cant, you will have to give me an "A" grading.
Professor agreed.
Pappu asked: What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?
Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give The student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as agreed.
The following day, Professor asked same question to his students. He was shocked when all of them raised their hands......
He asked one student. He answered:
Sir, you are 65, married to a 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical. Your wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, this is logical but not legal. Your wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet you have given him an "A", this is neither logical nor legal
PAPPU
Simple Addition
Teacher: If I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Seven Sir.
Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2rabbits and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Seven.
Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you 2 apples, and another apples and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Six. Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Seven!
Teacher: Where do you get seven from?
Pappu: Because I've already got one at home.
PAPPU
Pappu at His Best
Principal: School Ka time 8 baje Ka Hai Aur Tum 9 Baje Aa Rahe Ho?
Pappu: Sir Aap Na Mera Intezar Na Kiya Karo, Apne Time Se School Shuru Kar diya Karo.
Santa: Oyee ! Tumne Apni Sagai Kyun Tod Di ??
Pappu: Papa, Uska Koi Boyfriend Nahin Tha.
Santa: To Phir Problem Kya Hai ?
Pappu: Jo Aaj Tak Kisi Ki Nahin Ho Saki Wo Meri kya Hogi.
Pappu Apni Gali Ke Ek Dukandar Se: Uncle Rang Gora Karne Waali Cream Hai???
Dukandar: Haan Hai.
Pappu: Toh Lagate Kyun Nahi, Main Roz Aapki Shakal Dekhkar Darr Jata Hun?
Pappu: Daadi Neend nahi Aa Rahi. Hum Kuc Baate Karein?
Daadi: Theek Hai.
Pappu: Daadi Kya Hum Hamesha 5 Hi Rahenge? Aap, Mom, Dad,Main aur Behen.
Daadi: Nahi Beta aapki shaadi Ho Jayegi Toh 6 Ho Jayenge.
Pappu: Fir Behen Chali Jayegi Shaadi Karke Toh Phir 5 Ho Jayenge.
Daadi: Beta Phir Aapka Beta Ho Jayega Toh 6 Ho Jayenge.
Pappu: Phir Aap Mar Jaaogi Toh Hum Wapas 5 Ho Jayenge.
Daadi: Kaminne, Kutte, Haramkhor... Soja Chup Chaap.
PAPPU
Exactly like The MOON
One day a Professor was talking about marriage in the class.
Professor: What kind of Wife would you like Pappu?
Pappu: I would want a wife like the moon.
Professor: Wow !!! What a choice... So you want her to be Cool & Calm like the moon?
Pappu: No, no...
Professor: Oh, so you want her to be Round and white?
Pappu: No, no...
Professor: Oh, so you want her to be Fair and Beautiful like the moon?
Pappu: No, no... I want her to be Exactly like The MOON. Just Arrive at Night and Disappear in the Morning.
Professor fainted...
Strawberry Farm
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of manure.
A little boy, Pappu, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?"
"Manure," the farmer replied.
"What are you going to do with it?" asked Pappu.
"Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer.
"You ought to live here," Pappu advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."
PAPPU
Empty Head!
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, "Now class, if I stood on my head, the blood as you know, would run into it and I should turn red in the face."
"Yes, sir," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in an ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
Pappu shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
PAPPU
A Red Duck
A kindergarten teacher handed out a coloring page to her class.
On it was a picture of a duck holding an umbrella. The teacher told her class to color the duck in yellow and the umbrella green, however, Pappu, the class rebel, colored the duck in a bright fire truck red.
After seeing this, the teacher asked him, "Pappu, how many times have you seen a red duck?"
Young Pappu replied with, "The same number of times I've seen a duck holding an umbrella."
PAPPU
Pappu's Honesty
A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of shopping. It was found by Pappu and returned to her.
Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm.... That's funny and strange. When I lost my bag there was a 500 rupee note in it. Now there are ten 50 rupee notes."
Pappu quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward."
Focus Hard!
Teacher: What is the name of the capital city of Punjab ?
Pappu: Amritsar.
Teacher: Pappu, you are wrong, you need to focus more on your studies.
Pappu: Please madam, can I ask you a few questions.
Teacher: Yes, go ahead.
Pappu: Do you know Jeeto ?
Teacher: No.
Pappu: Do you know Preeto ?
Teacher: No.
Pappu: Do you know Banto?
Teacher: (Angry) Hell no! ##Who are all these people and why do you ask###
@@@Pappu: ###Teacher####you need to Focus more on your husband.
Pappu is 33 years old and still single. One day, a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"
Pappu replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."
His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution. Just find a girl who's just like your mother."
A few months later, they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"
With a frown on his face, Pappu answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."
The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"
Pappu replied, "Now my father doesn't like her."
PAPPU
Pappu Jokes
Pappu Bazaar Gaya. Wahan Use Papa Ke Ek Purane Dost Mil Gaye.
Uncle: Pappu Beta, Kaise Ho ?
Pappu: Ji, Badhiya ..........
Uncle: Aur Papa ?
Pappu: Ji Vo Bhi Badhiya.....
Uncle: Bhai ?
Pappu: Vo Bhi Theek Hai.....
Uncle: Studies?
Pappu: Vo Bhi Theek Chal Rahi Hai.
Uncle: Aur Sunaao Pappu Beta, Kya Chal Raha Hai ?
Pappu: Bematalab Ke Sawaal Jawaab.....!
Teacher: A B C D Sunao..
Pappu: A B C D...
Teacher: Aur Sunao??
Pappu: Sab Theek Hai Mam ji, Aap Sunao... Kya Chal Raha Hai Aajkal...?
English Teacher: Wo Larki Sab Larkon Se Hans Kar Bat Krti Hai. Batao Is Sentence Mein Larki Kya Hai ? Pappu: Sir! Larki Chaalu Hai...!!!
Teacher: Pappu, Iski English MEin Translate Karo: Larkiyan Yahan Se Guzar Chuki Hain.
Pappu: Oh Shit! I Am Late...
PAPPU
My Computer!!!
Pappu rings a call centre and complaining about his Internet.
Pappu: My internet is not working properly.
Officer: Ok, Double click on "My computer"
Pappu: I can't see your computer.
Officer: No no, click on "My computer" on your computer.
Pappu: How can I click on your computer from my computer?
Officer: Listen, There is an icon labelled "My Computer" on your computer. Ok double click on it.
Pappu: What the hell, what is your computer doing on my computer..?
Officer: Double click on your computer.
Pappu: On which Icon I've to click.
Officer: My Computer.
Pappu: Oh you fool......
Tell me where is your office. I'll come there and click on your "Computer."?
PAPPU
A Dinner Date
Pappu met up with his close friend Bunty and told him that he had just met the girl of his dreams. He asked Bunty for advise on how he should proceed!
The wise and experienced man of the world, Bunty said, "Well, send her roses, and on the name card invite her for a home-cooked meal."
Pappu liked the idea, so he followed Bunty's advice and invited the woman. Next day after the dinner Bunty called Pappu and asked him how did the home-cooked dinner go.
Pappu cried, "It was a complete flop."
Bunty asked, "Why? Didn't the girl come to your house?"
Pappu replied, "She came, but she refused to cook and left angrily!"
Legal and Logical
Pappu failed in the final Law Exam & decided to make a deal with the Professor.
Pappu: Sir, Can I ask you one question?
Professor: Yes.
Pappu: If you can answer this question, I will accept my final marks, if you cant, you will have to give me an "A" grading.
Professor agreed.
Pappu asked: What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?
Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give The student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as agreed.
The following day, Professor asked same question to his students. He was shocked when all of them raised their hands......
He asked one student. He answered:
Sir, you are 65, married to a 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical. Your wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, this is logical but not legal. Your wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet you have given him an "A", this is neither logical nor legal
PAPPU
Simple Addition
Teacher: If I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Seven Sir.
Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2rabbits and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Seven.
Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you 2 apples, and another apples and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Six. Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you 2 rabbits, and another 2 rabbits and another 2, how many will you have?
Pappu: Seven!
Teacher: Where do you get seven from?
Pappu: Because I've already got one at home.
PAPPU
Pappu at His Best
Principal: School Ka time 8 baje Ka Hai Aur Tum 9 Baje Aa Rahe Ho?
Pappu: Sir Aap Na Mera Intezar Na Kiya Karo, Apne Time Se School Shuru Kar diya Karo.
Santa: Oyee ! Tumne Apni Sagai Kyun Tod Di ??
Pappu: Papa, Uska Koi Boyfriend Nahin Tha.
Santa: To Phir Problem Kya Hai ?
Pappu: Jo Aaj Tak Kisi Ki Nahin Ho Saki Wo Meri kya Hogi.
Pappu Apni Gali Ke Ek Dukandar Se: Uncle Rang Gora Karne Waali Cream Hai???
Dukandar: Haan Hai.
Pappu: Toh Lagate Kyun Nahi, Main Roz Aapki Shakal Dekhkar Darr Jata Hun?
Pappu: Daadi Neend nahi Aa Rahi. Hum Kuc Baate Karein?
Daadi: Theek Hai.
Pappu: Daadi Kya Hum Hamesha 5 Hi Rahenge? Aap, Mom, Dad,Main aur Behen.
Daadi: Nahi Beta aapki shaadi Ho Jayegi Toh 6 Ho Jayenge.
Pappu: Fir Behen Chali Jayegi Shaadi Karke Toh Phir 5 Ho Jayenge.
Daadi: Beta Phir Aapka Beta Ho Jayega Toh 6 Ho Jayenge.
Pappu: Phir Aap Mar Jaaogi Toh Hum Wapas 5 Ho Jayenge.
Daadi: Kaminne, Kutte, Haramkhor... Soja Chup Chaap.
PAPPU
Exactly like The MOON
One day a Professor was talking about marriage in the class.
Professor: What kind of Wife would you like Pappu?
Pappu: I would want a wife like the moon.
Professor: Wow !!! What a choice... So you want her to be Cool & Calm like the moon?
Pappu: No, no...
Professor: Oh, so you want her to be Round and white?
Pappu: No, no...
Professor: Oh, so you want her to be Fair and Beautiful like the moon?
Pappu: No, no... I want her to be Exactly like The MOON. Just Arrive at Night and Disappear in the Morning.
Professor fainted...
Strawberry Farm
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of manure.
A little boy, Pappu, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?"
"Manure," the farmer replied.
"What are you going to do with it?" asked Pappu.
"Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer.
"You ought to live here," Pappu advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."
PAPPU
Empty Head!
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, "Now class, if I stood on my head, the blood as you know, would run into it and I should turn red in the face."
"Yes, sir," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in an ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
Pappu shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
PAPPU
A Red Duck
A kindergarten teacher handed out a coloring page to her class.
On it was a picture of a duck holding an umbrella. The teacher told her class to color the duck in yellow and the umbrella green, however, Pappu, the class rebel, colored the duck in a bright fire truck red.
After seeing this, the teacher asked him, "Pappu, how many times have you seen a red duck?"
Young Pappu replied with, "The same number of times I've seen a duck holding an umbrella."
PAPPU
Pappu's Honesty
A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of shopping. It was found by Pappu and returned to her.
Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm.... That's funny and strange. When I lost my bag there was a 500 rupee note in it. Now there are ten 50 rupee notes."
Pappu quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward."
Focus Hard!
Teacher: What is the name of the capital city of Punjab ?
Pappu: Amritsar.
Teacher: Pappu, you are wrong, you need to focus more on your studies.
Pappu: Please madam, can I ask you a few questions.
Teacher: Yes, go ahead.
Pappu: Do you know Jeeto ?
Teacher: No.
Pappu: Do you know Preeto ?
Teacher: No.
Pappu: Do you know Banto?
Teacher: (Angry) Hell no! ##Who are all these people and why do you ask###
@@@Pappu: ###Teacher####you need to Focus more on your husband.
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