Wife SMS Best Latest Message2017

• When a married man says:
• "I'll think about it" ,
• What he really means that,
• He doesn't kno~w his wife's opinion yet... =p =d
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• LOVE YOUR HUSBAND Because...
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• ...........................................................................
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• When he orders you to make tea or coffee.
• He wants to fe~el fresh to listen to your nostop talks.
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• Love him if he looks at all the beautiful females.
• He is just checking that you are still the best.
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• Love him if he criticize your cooking.
• He is still improving his taste.
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• Love him if he snores a~t night and disturbs your sleep.
• He is trying to prove that he is the most relaxed person after being married to you.
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• Love him if forgets to give you a gift on your birthday.
• He is saving money for future.
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• Love him Because...
• You don't hav~e a Choice...
• and killing is a legal offense
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• If u were my husband / wife
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• If you were my husband,
• I would poison your coffee
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• If you were my wife
• I would drink it.
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• Wife comes home late at night
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• Wife comes home late at night
• and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.
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• From under the blanket
• she sees four legs instead of two!
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• She reaches for a baseball bat
• and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.
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• Once she's done,
• she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.
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• As she enters,
• she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. :s
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• "hi darling", he says,
• "your parents ha~ve come to visit us,
• so I let them stay in our bedroom.
• Hope you have said hello to them.
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• Buying a diamond ring for wife
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• Wife : I saw in my dream
• that u were buying a diamond ring 4 me
• .
• .
• .
• Husband : i saw your dad paying da bill
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• A Special Package For Business Men.
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• An Airline Introduced
• A Special Package For Business Men.
• Buy Ur Ticket Get Ur Wife's Ticket Free
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• After Great Success,
• The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives
• Asking How Was The Trip.
• All Of Them Gave A Same Reply...
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• "Which Trip ?"
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• Wife wish 2 be a newspaper
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• Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
• so I would be in ur hands allday.
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• Husband: I too wish that u were
• a newspapers ~so I could have
• a new one everyday.
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• ...........................................................................
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• What's the similarity between chewing gum & begum(wife) ??
• .
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• Both are sweet at the beginning
• and
• become tasteless, shapeless and chipku in the eNd...
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• ...........................................................................
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• A successful man is one
• who makes more money
• than his wife can spend.
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• A successful woman is one
• who can find such a man.
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• Habbit of talking in sleep
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• ...........................................................................
• My husband has d~ habit of talking in sleep! wat shud i giv him to cure?
• Dr: Give him an Opportunity to speak wen hez awake
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• 5 funny facts of life
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• Having 1 child makes you a parent
• but having 2 makes you a refree.
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• Marriage is a relationship in which 1 person is always right
• and the other is always husband.
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• You can't buy love
• but you pay heavily for it.
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• Wife and husband always compromise,
• husband admits that he's wrong and wife too agrees with him.
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• Our language is called the mother tongue
• because the father never gets a chance to Speak.!:p
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• ...........................................................................
• LOVE IS LIFE
• LIFE IS WIFE
• WIFE IS KNIFE
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• and
• KNIFE IS DANGEROUS
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• Musibat abhi tali nahi hai
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• patni maike ja kar pati ko roz phon q karti hai.
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• taki pati ko yad rahe ki musibat abhi tali nahi hai
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• ...........................................................................
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• Wife Running After A Garbage Truck:
• Am I Too La~te For The Garbage?
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• Hubby Following Her Yelled: Not Yet.
• Jumpppp Innnn Fastttt.
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• ...........................................................................
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• A man came home late at night after a party.
• His wife yelled:
• "how would you feel if you don't see me for two days?"
• The man couldnt believe his luck: 'that would be great'!
• Monday passed and he didnt see her......
• Tuesday and wednesday passed too.....
• On thursday his swelling became better
• And now he could see her from the
• Corner of one eye;)
• ...........................................................................
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• Wife is dreaming in the middle of the night
• and suddenly sh~outs: "Up! Quick! My husband is back!"
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• Man gets up, jumps out of the window,
• hurts himself, and then realizes: "Damn, I am the husband!"
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• Why women starts with W
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• You know why women starts with 'W'...
• because all questions start with "W".. !
• Who ?
• Why ?
• What ?
• When ?
• Which ?
• Whom ?
• Where ?
• &
• Finally Wife..!!!
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• Wife said I'm dying
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• Husband texts to wife on cell..
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• "Hi,what r u doing Darling?"
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• Wife: I'm dying..!
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• Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"
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• Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."
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• Husband: "Bloody English Language!
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• ...........................................................................
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• Nobody teaches
• Volcanoes to erupt,
• Tsunamis to devastate,
• Hurricanes t~o sway around
• &
• no one teaches
• How to choose a Wife,
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• ...........................................................................
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• Difference betw~een Friend & Wife
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• Difference between Friend & Wife
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• U can Tell ur Friend
• "U r my Best Friend"
• But
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• Do u have courage tell to ur Wife
• "U r my Best Wife?"
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• ...........................................................................
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• M: My lovely wife.
• I: Is i am wrong in my sms?
• S: Sex is not only thing in the life.
• S: See, we have everything in our life you, me & our kids & good salaries and home also.
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• Y: You are everyting to me, my life my wife my jaan.
• O: Our life is just a good enough for us. Alhumdullah.
• U: U are the lucky one in my world... gave me our sweet family.
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• ...........................................................................
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• Everybody makes mistakes in this world
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• In this world everybody makes mistakes...
• But
• Only girlfriend, wife n boss have
• the gifted talent of finding them,
• remembering them n reminding them
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• Difference between Husband & gadha
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• Difference between Husband & gadha.
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• Ans:Husband gadha ban sakta hai,
• but
• Gadha itna bhi gadha nahi k husband bane!!
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• ...........................................................................
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• A recently fired
• stock trader said ...
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• "This is worse than divorce...
• I have lost everything
• and
• I still have my wife..."
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• What's the diff between Dava & Daru?
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• What's the diff between Dava & Daru?
• Dava is like girlfriend,
• that come~s with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
• Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.
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• ...........................................................................
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• Position of husband is like a split A.C.
• No matter how loud he is outside,
• but inside the house,
• he is designed to remain
• silent, cool & controlled by remote.
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• Wife:What is 10 years with me?
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• Wife:What is 10 years with me?
• Husband:A sec~ond.
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• Wife:What is $1000 for me?
• Husband:A coin.
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• Wife: Ok give me a coin.
• Husband:Wait a second
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• ...........................................................................
• Man: Si~r, my wife is missing.
• Postmaster:bhai ye post office hai,
• police station me complain dijiyee.
• Man:Kia karon, khushi k mare
• kuch samajh nahin aa raha
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• ...........................................................................
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• Wife came home with a goat.
• Husband asked"Is bhains ko ghar kion lai ho?"
• Wife:"Dikhta nahin, bakri hy!"
• Husband:"Bakri se hi poch raha hon"
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• ...........................................................................
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• Husband to a newly wed wife!
• I could go to the end of the world for you
• Wife:Thanks,but promise me
• you will stay there for ~the rest of your life.
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• ...........................................................................
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• Judge:why did ~u shoot ur wife
• instead of shootingher lover?
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• Sardar:Your honour,
• it's easier to shoot a woman once,
• than shooting one man every week.
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• Judge: How can you prove
• you were not speeding your car?
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• Man: Sir, I was on the way to
• bring back my wife from her mother's home!
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• Judge: that's all, case dismissed :p
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• How woman calls their husband in first 6 years
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• ...........................................................................
• Yr 1.Janu
• Yr 2.O G.
• Yr 3.Sunte ho?
• Yr 4.O bunty k pappa
• Yr 5.Kahan mar gaye?
• Yr 6.Tum aate ho k main aaon?
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• ...........................................................................
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• Last night was my fault,
• my wife asked,
• "what's on the TV?"
• and ..... I said, "dust!"
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• ...........................................................................
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• Friends Are like �Priya G~ld Biscuit� Haq Se maango
• Girl Friends are like Pepsi Yeh Dil Maange More
• Wife is like a medicine Bas Ek hi kaafi hai
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• Husband & wife are like liver and kidney.
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• Husband & wife ~are like liver and kidney.
• Husband is liver & wife is kidney.
• If liver fails, kidney fails.
• If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney.
• ...........................................................................
• Wife: What is so interesting in me
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• Wife: What is so interesting in me?
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• Husband: I dont know the meaning of interesting!!!
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• Any boyfriend before marriage
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• Husband 2 Wife : Did u Have any boyfriend before marriage ??
• Wife remains silent ����
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• Husband : Mai is Khamoshi ko kya samjhu ??
• Wife : Abbe gin ne to De��.
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• ...........................................................................
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• Husband aur Wife Hotel
• me gaye tabhi 1 Lady ne Hello kiya,
• Wife nay pocha,"Koun Thi Wo?"
• Husband:-Tum di~magh kharab mat karo,
• main pehle hi pareshan hun k woh bhi Yehi pochay gi.
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• ...........................................................................
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• Husband: Today is sunday &
• I have to enjoy it.
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• So i bought 3 movie tickets.
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• Wife: Why three?
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• Husband: 1 For U and 2 for ur parents.
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• ...........................................................................
• Wife called her husband
• Wife: honey where are you?
• Husband: I'm at the bank.
• Wife: dear, please I need 3000 rupees to activate my blackberry,
• 5000 to do my hair and
• 10,000 to buy a dress.
• Husband: sorry, I meant I was at the "bank" of a river.
• Do you want fish to cook?
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• ...........................................................................
• Wife: If I die what will u do?
• Husband: Main paagal ho jaun ga!
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• Wife: Will u marry again after I die?
• Husband: Pagal k~uch bhi kar sakta hai
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• One million copies of a new book sold
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• One million copies of a new book sold
• In just 2 days due to typing error of 1 alphabet in title.
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• "An idea,that can change ur wife''
• While real word was(life).
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• ...........................................................................
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• What is the difference between wife & saali?
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• Saali is Beauty,
• Wife is duy,
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• Saali is passion,
• Wife is tension,
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• Saali is patakha,
• Wife is sayapa,
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• Saali is cool,
• Wife is fool,
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• Saali is tuty-fruity,
• Wife is qismat futi,
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• Saali is fresh cake,
• Wife is earth quake...:p
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• ...........................................................................
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• Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
• That u we~re sending me
• Jewelry and clothes!
• Husband: yeah, I saw
• your dad paying the bill !!!
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• ...........................................................................
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• As per research
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• A man speaks 25,000 words daily
• &
• A woman speaks 30,000
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• Problem starts when husband comes home
• from office after consuming his 25,000 words
• &
• wife starts her 30,000..
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• ...........................................................................
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• Doctor:Madam, your husband needs rest
• and pease so here are so~me sleeping pills.
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• Wife: Doc, when should I give them to him?
• Doctor:They are for you.!!
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• ...........................................................................
• A Husband & Wife Were
• Arguing Ov~er Some Issue.
• After Much Of Discussion,
• Wife Finally Said:
• "Tell Me Dear ,
• Do You Want To Win
• OR
• Do You Want To Be Happy . . ?
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• ...........................................................................
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• Stupid and beautiful at same time
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• A Husband said to his wife One day
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• "I don't know how you can be so stupid
• &
• so beautiful all at the same time"
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• The wife responded ,
• "Allow me to explain,
• God made me beautiful
• so you would be attracted to me ;
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• God made me stupid
• so I would be attracted to you !"
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• ...........................................................................
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• If you marry one woman,
• She will fight ~with you.
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• But, if you marry 2 women,
• They will fight for you.
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• ...........................................................................
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• Add wife~, have life :p
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• Reports got mixed up
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• Doctor: sorry , reports got mixed up.
• We don't know if your wife has AIDS or Asthma!
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• husband: What should i do now?
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• Doctor - Send her 4 jogging,
• if she returns, don't sleep with her!
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• ...........................................................................
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• An Angry Wife To
• Her Husband 0n Phone:
• "Where d Hell Are You ... ?"
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• Husband:
• Darling You Remember That
• Jewelery Shop Where You Saw
• The Diamond Necklace n Totally
• Fell In Love ~With It n I Didn't
• Have Money That Time n I said
• "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... " O:)
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• Wife, With A Smile & Blushing:
• Yeah I Remember That My Love !
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• Husband:
• I m In The Pub Just Next To That Shop
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• Husband was seriously ill
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• Husband was seriously ill.
• Doc to wife :-
• Give him health~y breakfast, be pleasant & in gud mood,
• don!t discuss ur problems,
• no tv serial, dont demand new clothes & gold jewels,
• Do this for 1 yr & he will be ok.
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• On the way home..
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• Husband :- wat did the doc say ?
• Wife :- .No chance for u to survive
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• The King, queen & chess
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• Chess says everything
• about husband and wife.
• The King has to take things one step at a time,
• while the Queen can do whatever she wants.