Wife SMS Best Latest Message2017


  • When a married man says:
  • "I'll think about it" ,
  • What he really means that,
  • He doesn't kno~w his wife's opinion yet... =p =d

  • LOVE YOUR HUSBAND Because...

  • ...........................................................................

  • When he orders you to make tea or coffee.
  • He wants to fe~el fresh to listen to your nostop talks.

  • Love him if he looks at all the beautiful females.
  • He is just checking that you are still the best.

  • Love him if he criticize your cooking.
  • He is still improving his taste.

  • Love him if he snores a~t night and disturbs your sleep.
  • He is trying to prove that he is the most relaxed person after being married to you.

  • Love him if forgets to give you a gift on your birthday.
  • He is saving money for future.

  • Love him Because...
  • You don't hav~e a Choice...
  • and killing is a legal offense

  • If u were my husband / wife

  • If you were my husband,
  • I would poison your coffee

  • If you were my wife
  • I would drink it.

  • Wife comes home late at night

  • Wife comes home late at night
  • and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.

  • From under the blanket
  • she sees four legs instead of two!

  • She reaches for a baseball bat
  • and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.

  • Once she's done,
  • she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.

  • As she enters,
  • she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. :s

  • "hi darling", he says,
  • "your parents ha~ve come to visit us,
  • so I let them stay in our bedroom.
  • Hope you have said hello to them.

  • Buying a diamond ring for wife

  • Wife : I saw in my dream
  • that u were buying a diamond ring 4 me
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • Husband : i saw your dad paying da bill

  • A Special Package For Business Men.

  • An Airline Introduced
  • A Special Package For Business Men.
  • Buy Ur Ticket Get Ur Wife's Ticket Free

  • After Great Success,
  • The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives
  • Asking How Was The Trip.
  • All Of Them Gave A Same Reply...

  • "Which Trip ?"

  • Wife wish 2 be a newspaper

  • Wife: I wish I was a newspaper
  • so I would be in ur hands allday.

  • Husband: I too wish that u were
  • a newspapers ~so I could have
  • a new one everyday.

  • ...........................................................................

  • What's the similarity between chewing gum & begum(wife) ??
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .

  • Both are sweet at the beginning
  • and
  • become tasteless, shapeless and chipku in the eNd...

  • ...........................................................................

  • A successful man is one
  • who makes more money
  • than his wife can spend.

  • A successful woman is one
  • who can find such a man.

  • Habbit of talking in sleep

  • ...........................................................................
  • My husband has d~ habit of talking in sleep! wat shud i giv him to cure?
  • Dr: Give him an Opportunity to speak wen hez awake

  • 5 funny facts of life

  • Having 1 child makes you a parent
  • but having 2 makes you a refree.

  • Marriage is a relationship in which 1 person is always right
  • and the other is always husband.

  • You can't buy love
  • but you pay heavily for it.

  • Wife and husband always compromise,
  • husband admits that he's wrong and wife too agrees with him.

  • Our language is called the mother tongue
  • because the father never gets a chance to Speak.!:p

  • ...........................................................................
  • LOVE IS LIFE
  • LIFE IS WIFE
  • WIFE IS KNIFE

  • and
  • KNIFE IS DANGEROUS

  • Musibat abhi tali nahi hai

  • patni maike ja kar pati ko roz phon q karti hai.
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • .
  • taki pati ko yad rahe ki musibat abhi tali nahi hai

  • ...........................................................................

  • Wife Running After A Garbage Truck:
  • Am I Too La~te For The Garbage?

  • Hubby Following Her Yelled: Not Yet.
  • Jumpppp Innnn Fastttt.

  • ...........................................................................

  • A man came home late at night after a party.
  • His wife yelled:
  • "how would you feel if you don't see me for two days?"
  • The man couldnt believe his luck: 'that would be great'!
  • Monday passed and he didnt see her......
  • Tuesday and wednesday passed too.....
  • On thursday his swelling became better
  • And now he could see her from the
  • Corner of one eye;)
  • ...........................................................................


  • Wife is dreaming in the middle of the night
  • and suddenly sh~outs: "Up! Quick! My husband is back!"

  • Man gets up, jumps out of the window,
  • hurts himself, and then realizes: "Damn, I am the husband!"

  • Why women starts with W

  • You know why women starts with 'W'...
  • because all questions start with "W".. !
  • Who ?
  • Why ?
  • What ?
  • When ?
  • Which ?
  • Whom ?
  • Where ?
  • &
  • Finally Wife..!!!

  • Wife said I'm dying

  • Husband texts to wife on cell..

  • "Hi,what r u doing Darling?"

  • Wife: I'm dying..!

  • Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"

  • Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."

  • Husband: "Bloody English Language!

  • ...........................................................................

  • Nobody teaches
  • Volcanoes to erupt,
  • Tsunamis to devastate,
  • Hurricanes t~o sway around
  • &
  • no one teaches
  • How to choose a Wife,

  • ...........................................................................

  • Difference betw~een Friend & Wife

  • Difference between Friend & Wife

  • U can Tell ur Friend
  • "U r my Best Friend"
  • But

  • Do u have courage tell to ur Wife
  • "U r my Best Wife?"

  • ...........................................................................

  • M: My lovely wife.
  • I: Is i am wrong in my sms?
  • S: Sex is not only thing in the life.
  • S: See, we have everything in our life you, me & our kids & good salaries and home also.

  • Y: You are everyting to me, my life my wife my jaan.
  • O: Our life is just a good enough for us. Alhumdullah.
  • U: U are the lucky one in my world... gave me our sweet family.

  • ...........................................................................

  • Everybody makes mistakes in this world

  • In this world everybody makes mistakes...
  • But
  • Only girlfriend, wife n boss have
  • the gifted talent of finding them,
  • remembering them n reminding them

  • Difference between Husband & gadha

  • Difference between Husband & gadha.

  • Ans:Husband gadha ban sakta hai,
  • but
  • Gadha itna bhi gadha nahi k husband bane!!

  • ...........................................................................

  • A recently fired
  • stock trader said ...

  • "This is worse than divorce...
  • I have lost everything
  • and
  • I still have my wife..."

  • What's the diff between Dava & Daru?

  • What's the diff between Dava & Daru?
  • Dava is like girlfriend,
  • that come~s with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
  • Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.

  • ...........................................................................

  • Position of husband is like a split A.C.
  • No matter how loud he is outside,
  • but inside the house,
  • he is designed to remain
  • silent, cool & controlled by remote.

  • Wife:What is 10 years with me?

  • Wife:What is 10 years with me?
  • Husband:A sec~ond.

  • Wife:What is $1000 for me?
  • Husband:A coin.

  • Wife: Ok give me a coin.
  • Husband:Wait a second

  • ...........................................................................
  • Man: Si~r, my wife is missing.
  • Postmaster:bhai ye post office hai,
  • police station me complain dijiyee.
  • Man:Kia karon, khushi k mare
  • kuch samajh nahin aa raha

  • ...........................................................................

  • Wife came home with a goat.
  • Husband asked"Is bhains ko ghar kion lai ho?"
  • Wife:"Dikhta nahin, bakri hy!"
  • Husband:"Bakri se hi poch raha hon"

  • ...........................................................................

  •  

  • Husband to a newly wed wife!
  • I could go to the end of the world for you
  • Wife:Thanks,but promise me
  • you will stay there for ~the rest of your life.

  • ...........................................................................

  • Judge:why did ~u shoot ur wife
  • instead of shootingher lover?

  • Sardar:Your honour,
  • it's easier to shoot a woman once,
  • than shooting one man every week.


  • Judge: How can you prove
  • you were not speeding your car?

  • Man: Sir, I was on the way to
  • bring back my wife from her mother's home!

  • Judge: that's all, case dismissed :p

  • How woman calls their husband in first 6 years

  • ...........................................................................
  • Yr 1.Janu
  • Yr 2.O G.
  • Yr 3.Sunte ho?
  • Yr 4.O bunty k pappa
  • Yr 5.Kahan mar gaye?
  • Yr 6.Tum aate ho k main aaon?

  • ...........................................................................

  • Last night was my fault,
  • my wife asked,
  • "what's on the TV?"
  • and ..... I said, "dust!"

  • ...........................................................................

  • Friends Are like �Priya G~ld Biscuit� Haq Se maango
  • Girl Friends are like Pepsi Yeh Dil Maange More
  • Wife is like a medicine Bas Ek hi kaafi hai

  • Husband & wife are like liver and kidney.

  • Husband & wife ~are like liver and kidney.
  • Husband is liver & wife is kidney.
  • If liver fails, kidney fails.
  • If kidney fails, liver manages with other kidney.
  • ...........................................................................
  • Wife: What is so interesting in me

  • Wife: What is so interesting in me?

  • Husband: I dont know the meaning of interesting!!!

  • Any boyfriend before marriage

  • Husband 2 Wife : Did u Have any boyfriend before marriage ??
  • Wife remains silent ����

  • Husband : Mai is Khamoshi ko kya samjhu ??
  • Wife : Abbe gin ne to De��.

  • ...........................................................................

  • Husband aur Wife Hotel
  • me gaye tabhi 1 Lady ne Hello kiya,
  • Wife nay pocha,"Koun Thi Wo?"
  • Husband:-Tum di~magh kharab mat karo,
  • main pehle hi pareshan hun k woh bhi Yehi pochay gi.

  • ...........................................................................

  • Husband: Today is sunday &
  • I have to enjoy it.

  • So i bought 3 movie tickets.

  • Wife: Why three?

  • Husband: 1 For U and 2 for ur parents.

  • ...........................................................................
  • Wife called her husband
  • Wife: honey where are you?
  • Husband: I'm at the bank.
  • Wife: dear, please I need 3000 rupees to activate my blackberry,
  • 5000 to do my hair and
  • 10,000 to buy a dress.
  • Husband: sorry, I meant I was at the "bank" of a river.
  • Do you want fish to cook?

  • ...........................................................................
  • Wife: If I die what will u do?
  • Husband: Main paagal ho jaun ga!

  • Wife: Will u marry again after I die?
  • Husband: Pagal k~uch bhi kar sakta hai

  • One million copies of a new book sold

  • One million copies of a new book sold
  • In just 2 days due to typing error of 1 alphabet in title.

  • "An idea,that can change ur wife''
  • While real word was(life).

  • ...........................................................................

  • What is the difference between wife & saali?

  • Saali is Beauty,
  • Wife is duy,

  • Saali is passion,
  • Wife is tension,

  • Saali is patakha,
  • Wife is sayapa,

  • Saali is cool,
  • Wife is fool,

  • Saali is tuty-fruity,
  • Wife is qismat futi,

  • Saali is fresh cake,
  • Wife is earth quake...:p

  • ...........................................................................

  • Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
  • That u we~re sending me
  • Jewelry and clothes!
  • Husband: yeah, I saw
  • your dad paying the bill !!!

  • ...........................................................................

  • As per research

  • A man speaks 25,000 words daily
  • &
  • A woman speaks 30,000

  • Problem starts when husband comes home
  • from office after consuming his 25,000 words
  • &
  • wife starts her 30,000..

  • ...........................................................................

  • Doctor:Madam, your husband needs rest
  • and pease so here are so~me sleeping pills.

  • Wife: Doc, when should I give them to him?
  • Doctor:They are for you.!!

  • ...........................................................................
  • A Husband & Wife Were
  • Arguing Ov~er Some Issue.
  • After Much Of Discussion,
  • Wife Finally Said:
  • "Tell Me Dear ,
  • Do You Want To Win
  • OR
  • Do You Want To Be Happy . . ?

  • ...........................................................................

  • Stupid and beautiful at same time

  • A Husband said to his wife One day

  • "I don't know how you can be so stupid
  • &
  • so beautiful all at the same time"

  • The wife responded ,
  • "Allow me to explain,
  • God made me beautiful
  • so you would be attracted to me ;

  • God made me stupid
  • so I would be attracted to you !"

  • ...........................................................................

  • If you marry one woman,
  • She will fight ~with you.

  • But, if you marry 2 women,
  • They will fight for you.

  • ...........................................................................

  • Add wife~, have life :p

  • Reports got mixed up

  • Doctor: sorry , reports got mixed up.
  • We don't know if your wife has AIDS or Asthma!

  • husband: What should i do now?

  • Doctor - Send her 4 jogging,
  • if she returns, don't sleep with her!

  • ...........................................................................

  • An Angry Wife To
  • Her Husband 0n Phone:
  • "Where d Hell Are You ... ?"

  • Husband:
  • Darling You Remember That
  • Jewelery Shop Where You Saw
  • The Diamond Necklace n Totally
  • Fell In Love ~With It n I Didn't
  • Have Money That Time n I said
  • "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... " O:)

  • Wife, With A Smile & Blushing:
  • Yeah I Remember That My Love !

  • Husband:
  • I m In The Pub Just Next To That Shop

  • Husband was seriously ill

  • Husband was seriously ill.
  • Doc to wife :-
  • Give him health~y breakfast, be pleasant & in gud mood,
  • don!t discuss ur problems,
  • no tv serial, dont demand new clothes & gold jewels,
  • Do this for 1 yr & he will be ok.

  • On the way home..

  • Husband :- wat did the doc say ?
  • Wife :- .No chance for u to survive

  • The King, queen & chess

  • Chess says everything
  • about husband and wife.
  • The King has to take things one step at a time,
  • while the Queen can do whatever she wants.

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